Give Yourself to Love--Part 3

It was about a year-and-a-half later. With the kids safely fed and in bed, the couple lay together, talking awkwardly about the day. Sarah had something she wanted to say, and He could tell she did. Sarah stopped mid-sentence when talking about Molly.--"I was raped. In high school." She said it quickly and haltingly. This was the first time she said rape. It would take several more years to say it without flinching.

He was so overwhelmed. He didn't know what was right to do or say, so He allowed himself to react. "Oh, my God, Sarah. Who? Who did it?" Now He couldn't say it.

"Who doesn't matter." she said firmly.

"Of course it does!" He said raising his voice too much. She gave him a look that quieted him immediately.

"It doesn't because he's a grown man with his own life that I've no intentions of ruining. He has children that don't need to know what their father did. And I'm convinced, now that I've had time to think about it, that he didn't mean it. I know that sounds crazy. But he was really messed up that night. Like drugged or something..."

"It was in that park?" He was kind of breathless. And to his surprise, she laughed.

"No! Silly! It was at a party--someone's house. Some football player, I think. Maybe Matt Ingred's? I don't know. Someone's. Funny how the details slip, isn't it? I just... I went to that park to mourn, I think. I never told anybody, and so I told the trees, I guess." And with those words she understood for the first time the role those trees had played--they had been her confidant. She held her wrist, with its tattoo--a simple hourglass--just two triangles. He softly took her wrist from her. He traced the line with his fingertip. He had never known what it meant, (or even that it was an hourglass) and had never thought to ask. It just seemed like one of those tattoos you get in college; just to get one.

"It's an hourglass," she said smiling. "That's probably another story for another day, but it all ties in. And all my scars... I suppose I was coping in one way or another. You never asked about them, and I probably would have lied if you did, but since I'm sharing secrets, I may as well give that one up, too..."

"Oh, Sarah," He was horrified, but tried to portray worried. He was doing a decent job.

"Don't 'oh, Sarah,' me." she said. "I'm so much better now. You kind of broke my hourglass metaphor. You made me feel like a person again. I had to trust myself, but when I finally did, you were naturally the next person to trust. You saw my face first. So I gave myself up to you. And you've never failed me."

There was silence... then,

"I love you." they both said at the same time, and laughed. And in the hysteria of this release of their repressed, emotional tension, they couldn't stop. They laughed for what seemed like hours. They fell asleep spooning, with smiles still on their faces.