When Millie opened her eyes, she found Rachel's fingers had tightened around her arm--a death grip. Her body was twisted in a disturbingly uncomfortable-looking Q as she tried to accommodate for both her lock on Millie's arm and her fierce thumb-sucking. Millie tried to twist out, and Rachel's sleeping form tightened around Millie's arm. Although she mumbled nearly incomprehensibly, Millie could make out the words, "What will you do when you run out of room?" Millie, with curious heart, tried very carefully not to wake the sleeping girl as she loosened Rachel's fingers from her arm, so that she could listen for insight into Rachel's unconscious *logue. As she peeled off each finger, she felt like she was committing a sin. If someone lost their mother, they should hold a person for as long as they desire. She needed to be held, and so she held Millie instead, afraid the realization of her child-like needs would be left behind with the bravery it had taken to sneak into bed with Millie. Now she had her in, and her subconscious mind would not let her waste the opportunity.
Each pried finger was a sin, and Millie felt uneasy when Rachel kind of shriveled without that arm to hold. But she wiggled into some skinnys and put on an over-sized tank top and one of her dad's old cardigans. He had wanted to throw it away, and she couldn't let it happen. He dressed like such a professor. He was a tweed suit kind of man, and she loved that about him. She let her hair fall down her back. She was not in the mind for makeup or a straightener.
She opened her door quietly and walked softly down the hall, leaving a little part of her behind and carrying guilt away with her. She knocked softly on her parents' door. She knew they'd be getting ready for Church. Tracy putting on her favorite lipstick and putting on her panty hose--her father tying his tie. She appreciated their predictability.
"Come in!" Tracy's pretty voice called out. Millie slipped in and smiled at her parents. They were the kind of people you could smile at comfortably, because you knew they would smile back. "Good morning you two. Did you sleep well?"
Her father smiled a new smile; one which revealed his exhaustion--but he would not miss church. "We slept as well as we needed. How about you, lovely lady?"
"I was okay. Rachel came in and slept with me. I just let her. Is that okay with you guys?"
Her parents looked at one another and shrugged. It seemed okay by them. Tracy sat down on the bed and placed a hand on her back and a hand on her forehead. Millie recognized this posture, and she worried for her mother. She sat next to her mom, facing her, and placed the whole palm of her right hand on her mother's left cheek. Tracy looked at her darling daughter. She'd done well. She raised a good girl. And suddenly she was so overwhelmed with pride that her chest swelled and tears welled up in her eyes. Millie would misinterpret these as the stress of their newest responsibility, and Tracy, fully aware of this, just let her daughter believe it. She wanted to witness her daughter's next act of kindness.
"I'm going to stay here with Rachel while you guys go to church. Is that okay with you? Next week we'll bring her, but she needs her rest. Yesterday was too big, I think, even for church. It may take her a while to find peace with God again. I'll give her a week to be mad. But then she'll need to look at the whole situation with more depth. She's capable of it, but not yet. And I don't want her here alone."
She'd done well.
Her father pulled her into a goofy hug with a four second tickle fest. "We trust you, Millie. You do what you think best." And Millie hugged them both and pushed them out the door. They had shed their worried, tired faces and were laughing when they pulled out of the driveway. She'd done well.
She looked at her phone. She had three missed calls and five texts. She made her way through the texts from Facebook. These people were not as funny now as Millie had thought when she first subscribed to them, she deleted them each in turn, and made a mental note for the millionth time to unsubscribe. Then she had a call from a bro at work who, made lazy by his habitual pot-smoking, had been, nearly weekly, handing Millie his shifts. She was glad she'd slept through that call. She had more important things to attend to.
Then there was a text from Sarah. It only said hi, which was rather unlike her. She was big on emoticons. But there was nothing else. It was sent at 3:00am.
But before she called Sarah, she looked at a text from an unknown number. Hey pretty. Your name is Millie. I looked you up in our freshman yearbook because that was the only one I could find. You still had braces, but it's definitely you. Millie's heart beat faster, he palms were sweaty before she knew why her phone slid between fingers so lightly, and blood--blood was pounding in her ears. She was so scared, but felt compelled to act immediately. She didn't even know if Kylie had remembered their kiss. She added the contact to her phone, and then texted back as quickly as she could, making mistakes, "shoot, dang it!" Good to see you know my name now. You busy today? Her parents wouldn't be home for hours. Choir practice, church, bible study, and then they'd probably eat at the Family Restaurant with their church friends. Sunday was a big day for them. And she loved her parents, even if she didn't agree with them on everything. So she didn't feel bad protecting her parents from this.
I have to drop off my little brother at his football game, but that isn't until this evening.
You wanna come hang out with me? Movie and waffles in like 10 minutes here.
Count me in! Waffles are delicious... ;) Where you live?
505 Kentucky St.
Not far at all. I can be there in five. B-)
Good :)
=D
Millie tacked a note on the door in her room directing Rachel to head downstairs when she woke up. Millie would make her breakfast. Then she started on her's and Kylie's. When she heard a knock on the door, her throat muffled a squeal and she smiled in-deliberately. She ran to the front room then walked as calmly as her nerves would allow, to the door. She took a deep breath and opened it.
They watched Little Miss Sunshine and ate their waffles. The end of the movie received little attention, as will happen on most dates. Millie found Kylie on her lap and they were kissing again. And that kiss held within it all the same wrongness and excitement and genuineness that it had Friday night; only two nights before. And just as Millie's shirt was coming off, Kylie gave a little yelp and jumped to the opposite side of the couch. Panicked, Millie looked behind her. Rachel had woken up at a reasonable time, but for Millie the time had faded before her. She was content to live in the moment because the moment was precious. Linear time had disappeared from her short-lived reality.
"Rachel. I'm so sorry." She had so much more to say, but she wanted to gauge her reaction first. But Rachel just shrugged. "I don't care who you make out with. We all have secrets. I'm good with secrets. Just tell me next time she's over. You don't need to sneak around me. It'll make it easier on everyone involved. It wouldn't be the first time I saw someone having sex." Both of them were stunned into silence. But (God bless her), Kylie stood up. She walked right up to Rachel and stuck out her hand. "I'm Kylie. I only know what I heard about you from my mom because her best friend's husband is a cop. But my mom is kind of a bitch. She's also a drama queen. I think it's time you told us who you are. I hate when people tell my story for me."
Now it was Rachel's turn to be shocked. She wasn't sure what she had expected, but this was not it. She had a chance to tell everything. And she'd have insurance. They were falling for each other. Falling brings along with it vulnerability. She could tell their parents if they told on her. It was a safe place, and these were good girls, she could tell. She sat down in the recliner across from them on the couch. She took a deep breath and looked the two of them in their eyes.
"I always kind of thought Mother would kill herself. She was depressed a lot..."
*The blue word is not a neglected positive, but perhaps a neglected, unspecified kind of statement. I took it from both dialogue and monologue. It could have gone either way, really. Millie doesn't know if Rachel's dreaming words are to a character of her dream or if they're words to herself.
*The colors are important. I'm using those because the fonts here are pretty limited. Otherwise I'd be using fonts that I felt matched the personalities of these girls, because each has their own language in text messaging. And (hint, hint) these colors may come up later anonymously, and if you remember these or look them up, a character may be revealed to you in turn... for the one regular of you :P As for the once-a-months, they'll be left out of this little secret.
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